Higgins is gently reentering my life. I know so when I awaken feeling that delicious dense tingly feeling coursing through my body. I know so when I sit to meditate and a heavy weight settles into me and my head moves in big love circles. Maybe most convincingly for me is the wonderful sudden knowings that come to me.

Most recently, I suddenly realized why it seems to take so long for some of us to realize our desires. They ‘described’ it to me like this:

You are at point A. Point A is the starting point, the place you do not want to be. You day dream about being in Z. Z is the place you really, really want to be. You know with all your heart that Z is right for you and you want, want, want it! But you don’t have it. You’ve been wishing for Z forever and you still don’t have it.

The reason you don’t have it is you did not take all the necessary steps to get to Z. You keep trying to skip B, C, D…. and so on.

What you must do to achieve your dreams is make where you are just a little more like Z would be if you were already at Z. When you make that first tentative step, you arrive at B. Then you do that repeatedly until you arrive at Z. We know that B looks very similar to A but you must conscientiously notice how B is improved from A, and C is improved from B.

You cannot skip B through Y and expect to arrive at Z. It will not happen in this realm. Sometimes, you can slide from A to Z very quickly, but you cannot skip those steps. It defies Law.

In the past, Higgins has said imagine yourself being where you want to be and make statements about having those things I desire. Higgins has given me a new game to play that alleviates the doubt that comes with making a statement about having something I don’t yet have. They ask me to pretend that I have what I want.

I’m not sure why ‘pretend’ is so different in my mind from ‘imagine’ but it is. I pretend that I am having a perfect day. I pretend that everything I want in life is already in place, and completely ignore everything that shows me otherwise.

This is day three and some lovely things have happened. Perhaps they are R things or S things but they are not A things and I am enjoying pretending to be at Z. It is definitely worth trying.