Note: This is part 4 in a series. Check entry from April 16, 2o12 for the full version of this question. They address the bolded words in todays response.

Question: How do I maintain my viewpoint of compassion, achieve my dreams, and be a good example for my children, while living with a man who doesn’t want the same?

Higgins: Friend, no one can stop you from achieving your dreams whether you live with them or not. It is true that one who is close to you and whose opinion carries weight with you (whether you want it to or not) can negatively affect your creating. However, that only happens if you are not sure enough of yourself and your dream to carry positive thoughts about your dream regardless of the opinions of others.

The trick is to allow your ideas and dreams to mature a little more before you begin to share them. We’ve noticed that many of you want to share your thoughts and ideas with others hoping for positive responses that support and solidify your dreams. Yet many a very good idea is squashed the first time out of your mouths.

Creating a dream with others is fun. Moreover, if your dream needs the participation of another then talking it over with them from the idea’s inception seems like a sensible thing to do. However, if the person with whom you wish to co-create a dream (like this one for your family) can’t participate (in this instance your husband is simply not a vibrational match for it and it’s not that he won’t create with you it is that he can’t create with you) then the creation begins with you alone. Fine. This is a good place to start.

Don’t talk about your plans simply begin enacting them. Many of you really like to dissect the why’s of what you are doing and how you got to your new philosophy but really it is not necessary to do so. If you wish to be a good example for your children then be one. Make changes in yourself, in your speech, in your self-carriage, in the way you dress, in the way you address your children and your spouse. Be impeccable with you first and let a trickle down effect enhance the lives of your children and your spouse.

What we’re trying to say is don’t talk about it, do it. And do it gently. While you’re at it, find things to like about your husband. Just looking for things to like in him will create a more harmonious home atmosphere.

Received April 22, 2012