H: There are two things we want to expand upon from last week.  The energy, as our friend, WM, noted is significantly different than some years ago.  This is because you can carry more energy.  You’re more sophisticated.  A metaphor would be like learning a language.  Even in the beginning stages of learning a language, you might be able to communicate with somebody, but the depth of the conversation is more shallow than what you can have when you have a deep command of the language.  What you are doing is developing a deep command.  Your meditations are more powerful; in part you are more powerful because you are together.  If the entity were doing this by herself, it wouldn’t have the same power as all of you carrying it together.

In physics, if you have a wave, the wave is how fast your energy is.  If you are depressed, it is a long wavelength.  When you are happy, it is a very short wavelength. There is also amplitude and amplitude is the height of the wave. When more than one wave length is imposed upon the other you start getting higher waves.  That’s what you get when you work together as a team.  The wavelength will be the same but the amplitude is greater. That’s what you are doing.  Very powerful.  We know you do not totally understand this.  Some of you do not feel energy the way others feel it so you think you are not carrying the energy.  YOU ARE carrying the energy and carrying it well.  Everyone perceives differently and so your perception is a little bit different, but not perceiving the energy the same as others does not mean you are not carrying just as well as others.

Next, regarding our conversation of not proceeding until you feel better about whatever you are doing…

As an example of the consider getting up in the morning on a day you must go to work and you do not feel very good about going to work. If you leave home not feeling good about work you are going off with a negative vibration. We have discussed the issue about negative vibrations at length. Negative vibrations attract negative life experience.  We are suggesting that before you get in the car fix your vibration. 

How do you fix your vibration?  By practicing a stream of thought that says, “Okay, I’m going to work and I’m going to work for these reasons: I like the money; I want something constructive to do; I feel good about contributing in some way to society.” List your reasons for going to work, whatever they are. There are valid reasons why you are going to work, ignore the other reasons.  For example: I’m going because I would feel worse by not going. 

We understand it takes practice.  We have been working with the entity on this.  There are times when we are sitting for many, many minutes trying to help her sift through enough thoughts that she can finally get a positive feeling.  You have to have a reason why you can come into agreement with the thing that you are doing. 

Practice is important.  Why?  For example, the entity recently took a class on tractors.  The instructor was talking about tractor maintenance and tractor safety and why you do not leave the keys in the tractor. You do not leave the keys in a tractor because when you get out of the tractor you do not want somebody else getting in the tractor and move it. You could be underneath it.

So one fellow needed to get into the barn and he got in the tractor and moved it out of the barn.  It was a very large tractor.  Then he left it there outside the barn.  What happened was it had no oil and it was being serviced in the barn and the engine burned up and they had to replace a $30,00 engine. 

What we are saying is if you will keep moving when you are not in alignment, you are not oiled.  Metaphorically, you are going to burn up your engine.  You are going to cost yourself the equivalent of replacing a $30,000 engine by making things worse for yourself.

Remember last week we were talking about how you are graduating and moving to a next level course? Getting right with whatever is happening now is the next level course.  Do not move until you are at peace with whatever is the next action you are taking.  It is hard.  Very difficult.  You will not get it at first.  It takes practice.  This is one of the major skill sets that will help you find true joy in your life and help you have the kinds of wonderful things happening in your experience that you want to have happen. Wonderful things happen when you are not driving with no oil in your engine. 

P:  I have an example of not being in alignment this week.  It was a simple situation.  I was at the hospital and got a tube to have a lab draw and I went to the lab.  There were 4 people ahead of me.  I have to wait over an hour and kept looking at my watch.  I had a 2-hour window.  I’m trying to be calm.  Finally, it was my turn and I couldn’t help myself and said, “I don’t know why it is taking so long.  I’ve been waiting over an hour.”

The woman said they were training somebody and have had some difficult patients with lab draws.  I have a phenomenal vein and the person missed it and was digging around for it and I couldn’t stand it any longer and released the tourniquet because it was pinching my arm and I ended it. They didn’t have another tube so I had to back to the other building and find somebody and get another kit and go back the next day.  I kept thinking that if I had been more positive it likely could have gone a lot better.  I know better, but was getting so frustrated.  (Laughs)  

H:  If we could laugh about it with you without getting bucked off the entity we would laugh with you.  These opportunities are offered to you so that you can learn how to do it and do it well.  This was a learning opportunity for you and we are pleased that you are laughing now even though you were not laughing at the time. We are pleased that you are now saying, “Oh, that was an opportunity and I didn’t do it as well as I could have and I’m sure there will be another one coming up soon.”  All is well, and you are doing fine.

P:  I have had opportunities at work.  Some of those I am working with get so angry and have really bad energy.  If I am not protecting myself I get a really bad headache. 

H:  Let’s stop there.  Anger is a very powerful energy and people who get angry feel that they are losing their power.  Something in their life makes them feel powerless and they are infused with anger and righteous indignation or whatever that emotion is that gives them power.  Sinking lower than anger are those powerless emotions.  Remember our conversations about moving below rage and anger into those powerless emotions that don’t have very much creative potential? Anger has a lot of energy.  If you can learn to applaud them for trying to maintain their sense of power, it will help you a little bit. 

Now, the other part of this is people use their anger, they misuse their anger, as a tool to climb back out of their depressive energy.  They misuse anger knowing many people will cave into their anger and will shift their behavior.  The person expressing their anger can then feel better.  You are on a mission not to be swayed by other people’s anger.  We want you to know that this is their gift to you no matter how much you dislike it.  So go ahead from there. 

P:  A lot of time I get these headaches because they somehow get through my defenses.  My friend, Doris, whom I take care of (dementia).  She feels very powerless and very angry.  Every afternoon she starts calling me over and over.  She wants me to come down there.  I tell her I will come after work.  No, she wants me to come now.  I end up with a raging headache.  I know this is her energy give me the headache.  How do I defend myself? 

H:  If you can get right with your emotions about this, you will make your beautiful wave.  Then when she comes in with her own wave it will just pass through your wave without acknowledgment because they are not the same.  They don’t recognize each other.  If you will stay calm within her frustration, your calmness will help her be calm. 

P:  It often does.  She will get calm and I will get angry.  We trade emotions and that’s not a trade I appreciate.  I will do better to maintain my calmness. 

H:  Let’s try a couple of sentences.  When do you get the most frustrated? 

P:  When she calls and is crying and demanding I come there right now.  It really upsets me.  I want to come down there; I want to help her feel better, but I’m getting no respect for my life and what I have to do. 

H:  You understand that with her mental situation she can’t grasp what you are saying.  Anger for her is her fear of what is going on.  She doesn’t understand what is going on.  There was a point when she noticed something was wrong and then it was scary and she became more fearful and now she is feeling completely powerless and terrified. 

H:  Ok remember how to get your energy together first.  Go this way first; bring your energy back together and get yourself set.  She doesn’t know how to do that.  When you are a person like her, you do not understand what is going on; she’s lost her potency and is impotent to do anything about her situation.  Her energy is scattering to the winds.  This feels like a life-threatening hemorrhage.  It is a hemorrhage of energy, not blood.  She doesn’t know why she feels that way.  One thing we believe that you can do to help her is when you think about her in your mind you’re bringing your energy together for you but also helping her bring her energy together.  If you could on a subconscious, non-verbal level envision that you are helping her bring her energy together, she will probably calm down. 

P:  Do you understand the dynamic that sets up?  Every time she calls me she is upset and expects me to make her feel better.  Because I do this kind of function when I visit and when I call, it just makes her call me more often because she can’t figure out how to calm herself.  It has the unwanted effect of making her more dependent on me and it doesn’t help her be independent at all.  I don’t think she can at this point.  I can’t spend all day on the phone with her. 

H:  We are appreciating the clarification because it does change things a little, not a lot, but a little.  She is already calling you.  So to help YOU, you might have to help her. 

P:  Right. 

H:  What you are saying about her becoming dependent on you is a totally different thing than your first question.  This helps you to get right with you.  If you can get her to be calm, you can get yourself to be calm.  The only thing that is important to you (and each of you) is that you are right with you.  If you are not right with you, you cannot function in the world the way you were meant to function in the world.  Helping her calm down will help you get right with you. 

Now, if we have a second problem that it stimulates her to call you more, two things are going to happen: her dementia will get worse and she will forget you and forget to call you.  If you calm her down she will less and less need to call you.  You can even do it not on the phone but first thing when you wake up in the morning as a preventive measure.  You can help her not need you.  (long pause). 

P:  OK. 

P:  Can I ask you what would happen if you didn’t answer the phone every time?  She keeps calling over and over again. 

P:  Can you ignore it?

P:  I have been trying to, like maybe pick up every 3^rd or 4^th call.  I don’t know what the answer is.  They moved her to a different room and she went ballistic.  When I showed up she was fine.  All she needed to know was that I was going to be there.  She was fine, calm when I got there.  When I’m with her and my energy is calming for her that’s why she wants me to come all the time.  I finally had to turn my phone off because I had a doctor’s appointment and also was discussing her conservatorship so I couldn’t be interrupted because she is calling all the time especially in the afternoon.

H:  So there is a phenomenon that people experience and apparently this what she is doing.  In the morning she is better and then as the day progresses she is experiencing more agitation.  That may be why she gets worse that time of day.  One thing the entity is telling us to tell you is you can tell the nursing home that this is happening and take some extra energy into redirecting her at those times of day. 

P: I have talked to them.  They are thinking of changing her psychotropic meds and maybe making her less anxious.  I don’t think that is going to fix this. They are really just too busy to do a one -on -one intervention with her every day.  I think that is a good idea but I’m not sure what to do with that. 

H:  Get her energy together and help her get her energy together and try that for a while and also think of reasons and find the reasons that you are glad to be helping her because, again, as you become right with you with this instead of these somewhat resistant ways you have come into this, as you get right with it , as you find that connection then it will ease up.  It will ease up.  We cannot stress this enough.  This is not being done to you, but FOR you.  She is meeting an agreement that the two of you had.  And if you lose sight of your divinity and her divinity, then you are both lost.  She has had to have had quite a struggle to get to the point where she is doing what she is doing to meet your agreement.  If you will forget who she is, well, you are both lost. 

P:  I am trying to be patient and caring because I DO care.  I am attached.  It is hard for me not to respond to her and the headaches are killer. 

H:  We are not denying any of this.  It is all true.  We are here as a team to help you learn more about you and help you as a spirit being in a body go through these difficult times in the most difficult of times that any society has ever faced.  You are in it right now. So yes, it is hard.  Yes, you have headaches. Yes, sometimes things are miserable. Yes, it is harder than you expected.  So many things.  Yes, yes, yes, we totally agree and if you could see from our perspective how wonderful your situation is then we think that your heart would lift just a little, just a little and that is all you need is for your heart to lift just a little and feel the shift.  If you get right with yourself, she will shift to meet you.  That’s how the Universe works.  We are delighted for you.  We know that your plans that you set in motion are playing out just like you planned.  They are hard and difficult, painful and frustrating and they are exactly what you wanted so that you could expand in the truth of who you are which is a brilliant being of light. And, we know that when you are in these situations, they are so painful and you don’t want to hear beings like Higgins brightly saying woo hoo, you are so lucky, you’re doing it!  We know that you do not want to hear it b/c you are not in the vibrational equivalent to hear it; but these things are true.  You are doing it.  You are capable of getting through this and capable to allow the universe to shift gears so that on your behalf she stops.  But that takes you mastering a technique that you wanted to master.

P:  I worked with a lot of dementia patients and relatives.  There seems to be a couple of lessons for the care giver and that is learning how to dispense with guilt.  You have to have empathy and realize it is her path and no yours.  It is not your job to rescue her form her current situation.  You only job is to love, which brings me to the second lesson:  if she or a person demands so much out of you that your aura or your sense of who you are, all of your energy is being decoyed into unhealthy behavior for you and for her, you must be able to take steps like not answering the phone, guilt free, so that you are protecting your loving energy so when you are with her you can give her your undivided attention and love in a way that serves you both.  Handling the guilt part is the gift. Realizing what is hers and what is yours and where the two meet.  It is different for everybody who finds themselves in these situations, but guilt is a slippery slope.  The first step is to be aware of how it is attacking your energy. 

H:  Let’s shift gears. Last week we gave you a homework assignment to think about your future.  Does anyone want to share what they wrote? 

P:  I want to live in safety, physically and mentally and to be surrounded by  comfort and friends, animals, birds and plants and live in a garden-like environment.  I want sunshine and warmth around me.  I want to be able to go outside and walk at night.  I want bodily strength and stamina and move about comfortably and bend easily and to be independent in caring for myself.  I want to be cognitively aware and sound and able to read and retain comprehension and to enjoy memories and to look forward to new experiences.  I want to have meaningful conversations and continue to grow intellectually.  I want to be spiritually alive and inquisitive of our expanding consciousness and able to enjoy all my feelings emotionally and let the full range of emotions flow freely in my body.  I want to receive other’s emotions with love and discernment and to express my feelings to others with loving authenticity.  I want to be visually aware of beauty, to express my creativity, speaking, writing, drawing, painting, sculpting and crafts, etc. I want financial resources that flow easily to richly support my health and the environment I choose to joyfully surround myself with.  To live in and nurture living entities around me.  I want to be of service to others and remain open as to what this service looks like.  I want to be guided by my higher self and my guides and to use my energy in the best way possible for others and for my personal growth.  I want to live every day with quiet joy and moral courage and with great gratitude, giving and receiving love from all that is

H:  We are delighted with your statement.  When we asked you to do this homework assignment, we envisioned we would be coaching you all how to make improvements, but we have nothing to coach you on.  We are well pleased with that.  Remember your teacher said what is extraordinary is that you think this is ordinary.  This is how life is meant to be and you just did it.

P:  Be a loving presence for all I encounter, radiating, caring, sharing and helping.  Live in a peaceful, just world filled with beauty, joy and grace.  Have an enduring sense of my divine self and all others.  See the divinity and honor of all.  

H:  Apparently, we don’t need to coach you.  The goal is to think yourself in the future so that as your future unfolds, the unfolding is happy for you.  If you pick broad enough terms you allow the Universe wiggle room to provide you with the things that you wrote.  The Universe has all kinds of offerings for you.  Your job is to be open to what comes because it may not look like what you thought it would.  So being expansive and loving everything.  Yes, that will work. 

The entity’s is, “I choose to live a full and vibrant life so much so that when I look back at my life from those final happy breaths I say, “Wow, that was awesome!”  H H continues: If you tell the Universe, “Whatever I do I want it to be fantastic.  I want it to make me happy,” that leaves the Universe a very broad range to work with.

Meditation.  A very powerful one we call Respecto.  Respect can be confused with having good manners.  We are talking about a sense of true gratitude for other human beings living their lives in such a way that they work for your betterment.  Your life is better because they put a huge effort into this on your behalf.