Question: How do I stop depending on others for so much? I don’t feel capable of doing anything on my own, and deal with constant anxiety. I am pushing people away. Any advice?
Higgins: This is a beautiful question. It is important to have recognized that not feeling capable is not right for you.
You are, and each of you is, completely capable. The Earth experience is designed to be a safe and fun place where each of you can stretch the limits of your being-ness. Unfortunately, the game is very difficult to play without directions. Verbal and written instructions for the game were once readily available but over time they’ve been altered, lost and even intentionally destroyed.
Regardless of what has happened in the past now is the time to remember the instructions and master the game. (In a nutshell that is what the whole 2012 thing is about.) That is why you and many others are struggling with this sort of issue. Life doesn’t feel right and in fact, it isn’t.
Let’s remind you of Who You Are by reviewing directions for playing The game.
You are an eternal being of light. You are eternal consciousness and like that which you call God you are a creator of things. That is what the Bible means when it says you are created in His image. Additionally, it means that all things are part of a whole and the whole and the part are the same thing. In the physical realm all this means is that everything around you is metaphor for something that has been created in the mind of man.
The eternal consciousness that you are decided to come into the physical realm of Earth for the fun of it and also to sharpen your skills as a Master Creator. Each of you comes forth with some kind of gift and the tools necessary to play. The Eternal You stays focused in non-physical while at the same time putting forth a portion of itself into physical, that’s you. The two yous made agreement about having fun and what things would bring a sense of pleasure unto you. What is a happy, positive thing for one may or may not bring the same sense of pleasure to another.
In this body you have the ability to communicate with that Broader You and you do so all the time. Emotions are the communication tool used most. Also, you are guided by impulse and intuition. Emotions will never steer you wrong. Intuition and impulse can become off balance but emotions will always be true.
Emotions are offered by the Broader Self relative to the pre-birth agreement you made together. Negative emotions indicate that in some way you have strayed off course from the agreement and positive emotions indicate that you are on track with that agreement.
You (the questioner) feel negative emotion because you are not focusing on your life experience the way you agreed to do. Your Broader Being will never stop issuing these negative emotions as long as you persist in focusing on yourself and your life the way you are. Your Broader Being disagrees with the thoughts you are having about yourself intensely and that is why you feel so bad.
The agreement you have with You is that you are capable, bright, kind and cheerful. The agreement you have with You is that there is nothing you cannot achieve and that while here in physical you will look at the life that comes to you as a sort of living data system. Each life experience is to be sifted through and your agreement says you will have positive feeling to stimulate you towards that which is right for you and will be pleasing and you will feel negative emotion when you receive data that leads you into mis-creating.
Mis-creating means you have allowed yourself to notice the negative aspects rather than the positive aspects of a thing, an experience or even a thought.
Once you have determined from your emotions what makes you feel pure, powerful and positive set your attention to those things. Thought, word and action that bring you closer to achieving those things will make you feel good and life will be enjoyable.
(We know this is getting lengthy. Stay with us.)
A feeling of dependence and anxiety are both far from the Truth of You. Remember you are capable and ingenious and have access to all the tools you will ever need to make a wonderful life for yourself.
People draw away because you either shove them away as you try to regain the balance you know is right for you or the negativity you emit repels them. The result is the same.
We encourage you to center your energy. This is a quick way to regain your balance. Energy should generally flow from just above the head to just below the feet. The energy that runs through you is designed to ground in the Earth. Gently draw your energy back from the energy thieves in your life. Use a gathering motion with your hands and arms…imagine Jesus drawing the little children before him saying, “Gather around me little ones.” You will say instead, “Energy stay with me.”
Once you feel a little stronger direct your energy to flow from head to toe.
You should feel better in seconds to minutes. Once life energy is flowing properly it is much easier to make decisions about what’s next. Please remember that nothing about this life is an energetic one way street. If you are a person in a mode to (negatively) give away energy there will always be another around to feed off you and suck you dry. The hard part for you is to stay stable while the others who are used to taking from you stabilize their own energy. You will need to practice centering many times a day.
From this more centered place begin making decisions. Consider what is wrong in life and make choices that bring relief. Example, the house needs to be vacuumed. You hate to vacuum but leaving it messy feels worse than cleaning up. Clean up. Example, a significant change is needed in your life. You know what change is needed but are afraid to take action. The thought of making the change makes you feel sick inside but the thought of what life will be like once the change is initiated feels like relief. Go for relief every time.
This last paragraph really is the sum of what we encourage for you. Start to make decisions for you and stop making decisions because other people want you to want to make them. Said another way, make decisions because your insides tell you to and not because your friends or family or society have molded you into wanting what they want you to want.
It may seem ugly at first. We assure you, though, that taking the first steps may be hard but taking them leads to the life of dreams and not taking them leads right where you already are.
Sunshine, we adore you. We know you have the capacity to do what needs to be done. We also know you already know what you need to do. Doing it seems overwhelming perhaps but as we said, not doing it leads to where you are right now and where you are emotionally right now is not life giving.
Blessings, Friend, as you sort out this magnificent journey.
Received June 5, 2013 at Lake Goodwin, Washington
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