Praying for a Power Totem

Posted on March 17, 2021 by Cheryl Jensen

This is my entry for December 5, 2004:

This morning I awoke and lay in bed with my eyes closed. As I lay still, a green eye came clearly into view. It startled me. A nose came with it and appeared to be wolf. (Not a wolf, the essence of wolf.) Last night, I prayed again for my power totem to appear. I thought, “Oh darn. It’s wolf.” I wanted a leopard but wolf is good.

(Note: Can you imagine my rudeness? Wolf was far too common. I wanted a leopard because of their stunning coat.)

Wolf looked around inside me, not judging, just looking at what was there. He left. By that time I decided wolf was a good totem so I said, “Welcome.” (Like you get to choose… I laugh at myself now.)

A few moments later eyes came to me one after another. I can’t remember them all and I had to guess what animal they were because most just showed their eye. Owl showed an entire head. After owl I thought bald eagle would stop but it was just an impression. No eagle. Same with bear–just an impression that bear was coming by but didn’t come in. It was as though they were on they other side of a veil.

I saw a set of eyes above water that I thought was frog. Later, I saw frog in entire profile. A whale, I don’t know what variety, rolled over so his eye peered out of the water at me. A domestic cat appeared and its face morphed into a wild cat then back to domestic and then to wild. I saw the domestic cat’s full face but just the eye of the wild cat so I don’t know what kind of cat it was. There were other animals, I think, but I can’t remember them.

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A Shamanic Journey

Posted on March 14, 2021 by Cheryl Jensen

When Higgins came to me, I was attending First Congregational United Church of Christ in Everett. We were a very open an inquiring group, for the most part. Our pastor invited a couple, David Thomson and Mattie Davis-Wolfe, to lead a group called Sacred Circles. At that time, I was part of the Education committee. In fact, I was the education committee since no one else was on the committee at that time. I didn’t have any idea what Sacred Circles was about so I decided to attend a meeting to discover what Sacred Circles was all about. I ended up meeting with that group for five years and credit them with helping me meet Higgins. If it was not for their teaching, I may never have relaxed enough to allow anything so far outside my ideas of normal to occur.

Sacred Circles met every Wednesday evening. One of the things we learned to do is ‘journey’. Shamansim.com defines journeying as a visionary experience, in which one is able to achieve an altered state of consciousness or trance.

This is what I wrote on November 13, 2004:

Thursday night I tried to “journey” on my own. I was in bed and tucked my medicine blanket in on one side and Bailey (my cat) on the other. Then, because I don’t have sage to smudge and I’m afraid to call in the directions, I prayed for God to keep me safe on my journey. I was trying to find out why I fill my time up so fully the way I do.

Anyway, I was able to watch a place in my mind’s eye start to work as a kaleidoscope. It got more and more fantastic and then exploded into the night sky. I felt myself at the opening, looking into the black sky dotted with stars and realized I had gone up into the sky, rather than into the earth. I hesitated, a little afraid, and could not get out into the sky.

I came back carefully, I tried again and virtually the same thing happened. I was lying on my back during this. So I rolled over and tried again. This time the kaleidoscope started but changed into a ladies ruby necklace. It was formed like lace and became more and more intricate as I watched. Eventually, the rubies turned black. Then the necklace morphed into black iron railing surrounding a stone staircase. The staircase circled down to the left. I admired the stonework and realized this time I was going down. But the stairs got darker and darker and I was afraid. As I hesitated the stairs became a chute and I couldn’t figure out how to get on it. Then it shrank up, lickety-split, until the chute was so narrow I couldn’t get into it anyway.

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Age of Aquarius

Posted on March 10, 2021 by Cheryl Jensen

This next post is dated November 8, 2004. This is the morning after my ‘heavy’ experience.

“I awoke in the middle of the night and my mind was playing, ‘This is the dawning of the Age of Aquarius, Age of Aquarius, Aquarius!'”

If you’ll remember, this is a song by The Fifth Dimension.

As you know, it is considered to be true by many that we are transitioning from the Age of Pisces into the Age of Aquarius. Wikipedia reminds us that an astrological age is a product of the earth’s slow precessional rotation and lasts for 2,160 years on average..

Some believe that the Age of Pisces reflected religion and spirituality and heralded the arrival of Jesus, and that the Age of Aquarius moves us into an age of peace and harmony.

A definition from selfgrowth.com states: The destiny of humanity in the Age of Aquarius is the revelation of truth and the expansion of consciousness.

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Interest Level

Posted on March 8, 2021 by Cheryl Jensen

There has been a lovely response to my plan to share on my experiences prior to Higgins’ arrival. My original plan was to post weekly, but in response to the interest level I’m going to post twice weekly, on Wednesdays and Sundays. Many of the entries are quite short and I think you all would get a better idea of the tempo if I posted more frequently, similar to the way I experienced it.

Let’s test out this twice weekly thing and see how it goes.

Thank you for joining me on this remembrance, and for forgiving what is often poor grammar and poor sentence structure. These remembrances are, after all, from my journal that I often jotted down very quickly before bed. (And certainly never expected to let anyone else read!)

Cheryl Jensen, March 8, 2021

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A Heavy Feeling

Posted on March 3, 2021 by Cheryl Jensen

Considering how long ago it’s been since Higgins first came to me, it is a tad difficult to decide exactly where to start chronicling our history. If I wait to find the exact right place to start I may never start, so I’m choosing to start with this entry from November 7, 2004, because I remember how dramatic the feeling was.

“A couple of days ago I was sitting at the dining room table. I was thinking that I felt very comfortable with myself. As I sat there I began to notice feeling heavy. And heavier and heavier until I felt the need to lie down on the floor to avoid the weight. I didn’t, because I felt too foolish.

Anyway, I was feeling quite comfortable with myself and feeling very grounded when I began to feel so heavy! I felt heavy as though gravity would pull me right through my chair, through the floor.”

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History of Higgins

Posted on February 24, 2021 by Cheryl Jensen

I’m a little surprised to discover that people are actually interested in how Higgins came to be with me. Since our daily meditations are routine and unexciting I thought I would share something of our history. I have kept journals for years and have located them, all except the one in which they actually arrived….how could I mislay that one? Nevertheless, I’m reading up on my last twenty years to find the right place to start.

They came in 2005. March probably. Back then I worked evening shift and arrived home about 11:45 or midnight. My habit was to meditate for a bit before going to bed and once they arrived those meditations became surreal. But looking back, there was a prelude, a period of time before their arrival when many strange things happened. I will start there.

I invite you to join me in remembering the early days of Higgins.

Cheryl

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Meditation January 26, 2021

Posted on January 26, 2021 by Cheryl Jensen

Higgins visited me yesterday morning and asked once again for me to begin meditation for fifteen minutes every day. Actually, they asked a few things:

  1. meditate 15 minutes every day
  2. write 15 minutes every day
  3. continue my current exercise regimen
  4. continue my current diet (of no food additives)
  5. and to do something every day towards making my life and surroundings exactly as I would have them be

This morning I did my fifteen minutes of meditation and they moved my head around a bit. I’ve no idea whether it is important but they did a left right movement first tilting my right ear towards my right shoulder and then left ear towards left shoulder. This moving of my head becomes monotonous and at one point they paused and it was clearly a message to me to wait for them to move me rather than anticipating that they will move me and moving first.

If you have ever practiced ballroom dance, the gentleman leads and the lady follows. Sometimes, a lady can follow too closely and the lady will move, anticipating what is coming next, before the gentleman’s movement invites her to do so. Apparently, I was following too closely.

They did that for fully fifteen minutes and at the end they didn’t leave. I opened my eyes and waited for them to do something but all they did was stare intently at a spot on the world map on the wall about twenty feet away. When I finally realized that was the message, I noted the location. Once I had noted the location to their satisfaction they moved my eyes to another location and finally to a third. When I had all three firmly fixed in my mind they left.

I walked across the room to the map and noted the locations. The first was between Argentina and Chile, but not on the coast. The closest city is Salta. There is a large area south and west of Salta with no cities indicated on the map. That seemed to be the area they were focused on.

The second area was in the Caribbean around the islands of Grenada and Barbados. Definitely not as far north as Cuba nor as far south as the South American continent.

The third area they focused on was covered by a paper that I had pinned up. Even after lifting the paper and looking closely, the best I could determine was Pakistan, Afghanistan, Iraq. I don’t think it was as far south as Saudi Arabia, Dubai or Oman.

I have no idea why they focused my eyes so intently on these three areas. When I find out more I will let you know.

Cheryl

January 26, 2021

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Higgins’ Arrival Update

Posted on January 18, 2021 by Cheryl Jensen

Someone asked recently if I am okay since I’ve been silent lately as regards posting on Ask Higgins. Yes, I’m okay. This past year was very slow workwise, second to the corona virus shutdown, so in the fall, when more work was offered, I accepted all the hours I could. With the arrival of the Covid vaccine, I have also been working with the vaccine administration process in my workplace/community. While I am extremely appreciative of the work, it often leaves little time, energy or enthusiasm for meditating and writing.

It is also of note that when my schedule is as full as it is, it is frequently difficult to access them. Something did occur that may be of interest although I am loathe to share it since I have never truly believed that it will come to pass.

One day I was trying to connect with then to determine whether there is anything specific I could do to speed up their arrival. (They indicated they are already here.) Then I asked whether I could do anything helpful. (They indicated that they are well pleased with my current exercise routine, as well as with my current diet which is simply the omission of additives of any kind from my food. Higgins would like me to continue this course of action permanently.) Next, I asked whether we (Higgins and I) are ready for whatever it is that we will do next. (Yes.) What, then, is the holdup, I wondered? (The response: They are ready. I am ready. We await some moment of need in the social, and also ecological, realm and I cannot decipher what that special moment is.)

I further asked whether they are already using me for whatever it is while I sleep. (Yes.) Note that when they left in July of 2018–it was 2018, wasn’t it?– they stated that the next segment would be the knowledge phase and that they would work through me while I was not conscious. I finally realize that being asleep is not conscious and was quite disappointed that this might be all there is. Pretty anticlimactic if I will never be aware of what they are doing. That prompted me to ask whether I will know of the work they do. If I understood correctly, 90% of what they do with me will be while I’m asleep.

Of course, I was disappointed to know that. I want to enjoy whatever it is they are here to do so I pressed on. What happens during the remaining 10% of our time together?(They indicated that time is when I will be awake but they will assume use of my body to do whatever overt work they are going to do.) This use of my body is the very thing I have understood them to say they would do since the very beginning. I hope they will, if only to build my trust in them. They went on to say whatever discomfort we are having in the world right now, it will get worse and there will be times when they are drawn forth to assist us. It also did seem as if that time is very close.

From time to time I have moments of dizziness and I wonder whether they are practicing. For example, if they take over and there is a moment of passing my body’s functions from me to them, isn’t it possible I would collapse and be hurt in the process? I like to think they have this well in hand. Sometimes I hope we will pass through our difficulties with ease and instead draw them out for something fun and inspiring. Either way, whatever it is I believe it will be coming soon.

Cheryl

January 18, 2021

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Meditation, December 7, 2020

Posted on December 7, 2020 by Cheryl Jensen

Last week, I think it was Wednesday night, my dog woke me up. He has this habit of smooshing his body up against the bed and rubbing alongside the mattress , then poking his nose in my face when he needs to wake me up so he can go out. When I awakened I was tingling head to toe. This has happened many times over the last few years but this was especially intense. It lasted quite awhile and during the moments I was appreciating this exquisite yumminess of their energy coursing through me, the dog went out to the living room and back to smoosh up against the bed at least three times.

You can imagine I was beginning to worry that he might not be able to wait any longer so I decided to get up, even though the energy was still coursing through my body very strongly. Funny thing…I couldn’t get up. It was several more minutes before they let me up and that was the end of it for that night.

I bother to share about it at all because something different from their usual happened last night. I sat down to meditate before bed but couldn’t calm my mind enough to reach them so I finally went on to bed. I was deliciously drowsy by this point and just as it seemed I was drifting off to sleep they came in that same wonderful, tingly way. The energy wasn’t quite as intense as that interesting event last Wednesday but what was interesting is that they have never come in while I was awake except for the first time back in 2005. Always when I feel this coursing energy it happens when I ‘catch’ them at it because I awakened unexpectedly.

I do wonder what they are up to.

Cheryl, December 7, 2020

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Meditation, November 30, 2020

Posted on November 30, 2020 by Cheryl Jensen

It was too cold to spend much time in the garden this afternoon. After an hour I was ready to go back inside. The house was quiet so I sat to meditate and it was generally so boring as to not be worth writing about. Except for one thing. A quite large and gentle being settled into me. At first, I thought it was the ‘essence of doe’ that I have bumped into before. She quickly clarified that she was not. Still, she had that doe-like feminine, soft presence.

She began to move my head in an infinity pattern. After many of these rather large movements that are like a figure eight lying on its side, my nose began to lift with each successive cycle. Each time my nose lifted the infinity pattern became smaller until, when my nose was quite high, the movement became very small. Then she stopped moving my head and all was still for a moment. Then she ‘said’ to me, “You’re ready.” The she ‘said’ to someone else (non-physical), “She’s ready.”

Then she left.

What do you suppose I’m ready for?

Cheryl Jensen, November 30, 2020

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